Bringing up the subject of infertility with someone who is trying to conceive and failing can be a bit difficult, but you shouldn’t give up! You can get the right conversation going by knowing the right things to do and say (and not to say).
Here are some helpful tips for you:
Let them know you care.
The best thing you can do for your infertile friends is let them know that you care. You do not have to overdo it; just simply let them know that you are there for them if they need someone to talk to or to keep them company.
Do your own research.
If you want to understand their situation, it is best to read up about infertility. You should be familiar with possible treatments and other family building options that your friend is considering. Doing so will make you a better listener if your friend needs to talk.
Ask them how they are.
Some people tend to focus so much on asking about fertility treatments they actually forget to ask how their friend is doing personally. Sometimes, your friends will appreciate it if you ask how they are sincerely and if you ask them what they might need.
Watch their older kids.
Attending appointments and fertility treatment sessions can be difficult especially if they have older kids at home. It will definitely help them out knowing that someone they trust will be looking out for their kids.
Reach out to your male friends.
Keep in mind that infertility does not just affect women, it affect men just as much. Your male friends are most likely grieving in silence – do not push them but also make yourselves available for them.
Do not tell them to relax.
Comments such as “Just relax,” or “Take it easy,” create even more stress for an infertile couple. They might feel as if they are doing something wrong when there is a good chance that there is a more serious problem preventing them from becoming pregnant.
Avoid bringing adoption up.
You might think that adopting is the best solution for infertile couples but pushing this suggestion might be offensive for them. Give time for the couple to discuss their options on their own.
If you are going through infertility, or you know someone who is, you may want to setup an appointment with Dr. Fay Weisberg. She will help you choose the best fertility option for you.